To be unique.

Well over six billion people walk the face of this earth right now, each of us unique in our own way. We may have similar likes, dislikes, drives, motives, hobbies, and desires as many of the people around us, but that does not change the fact that we are meant to be unique. I feel it is true to say that there are few (if any) individuals in the world that are completely free of living there lives to “fit it.” We practice this idea to different degrees, some people are only slightly affected while other live their lives to be a part of the “in crowd.” We try so hard to fit this model of what society has made for us or what we see the “cool kids” doing that we lose those precious things that make us who we truly are. This may be our standards, our real friends, our dreams, our style of clothing, or many other things. We begin to let others rule and reign over our choices. I remember in High School seeing a poster, I do not remember what it said word for word, but it stated,

-Twenty years from now, no one will remember or even care about the shoes you wore, how many friends you had, or the cool things you did. What they will remember is the type of person you were and they will see what you have become.-

I would add to that the people that only see what you were in High School are the people that have completely missed the point of life.

 “The man who trims himself to suit everybody will soon whittle himself away.” –Charles Schwab

I am not trying to say we shouldn’t try to look nice or keep up with the latest technology. I wear a suit to work every day because that is what’s professional and it is expected of me. I am not going to quit my job just because I REALLY don’t like wearing suits. Being yourself does not mean that you have to rebel against society just to prove you are “different”, that is just as bad as losing yourself to fit in with everything society tells you is important.

If you enjoy something that doesn’t seem to fit what the people around you think is cool, it is okay. If they give you a hard time about enjoying it, those probably are not the people I would consider real friends. If you feel like something is wrong and the people you are trying to impress think it’s the cool thing to do, once again these are not the people you need to worry about.

“Don’t let the voice of critics paralyze you.”

Merry Christmas in February!

For those of you who do not know, I. Love. Christmas.
I love the happy and joyful feeling in the air and i love the fact that everyone seems to be much nicer and more giving. Here is a story i heard not too long ago that i love, and yes it is a Christmas story. Enjoy! or not...

       The brand new pastor and his wife, newly assigned to their first ministry, to reopen a church in suburban Brooklyn, arrived in early October excited about their opportunities.  When they saw their church, it was very run down and needed much work.  They set a goal to have everything done in time to have their first service on Christmas Eve. 

     They worked hard, repairing pews, plastering walls, painting, etc., and on December 18 were ahead of schedule and just about finished.

     On December 19 a terrible tempest—a driving rainstorm—hit the area and lasted for two days.

     On the 21st, the pastor went over to the church.  His heart sank when he saw that the roof had leaked, causing a large area of plaster about 20 feet by 8 feet to fall off the front wall of the sanctuary just behind the pulpit, beginning about head high.

     The pastor cleaned up the mess on the floor, and not knowing what else to do but postpone the Christmas Eve service, headed home.  On the way he noticed that a local business was having a flea market type sale for charity, so he stopped in.  One of the items was a beautiful, handmade, ivory colored, crocheted tablecloth with exquisite work, fine colors and a Cross embroidered right in the center.  It was just the right size to cover the hole in the front wall.  He bought it and headed back to the church.

     By this time it had started to snow.  An older woman running from the opposite direction was trying to catch the bus.  She missed it.  The pastor invited her to wait in the warm church for the next bus 45 minutes later.

     She sat in a pew and paid no attention to the pastor while he got a ladder, hangers, etc. to put up the tablecloth as a wall tapestry.  The pastor could hardly believe how beautiful it looked and it covered up the entire problem area.

     Then he noticed the woman walking down the center aisle. Her face was like a sheet.  “Pastor,” she asked, “where did you get that tablecloth?”  The pastor explained.  The woman asked him to check the lower right corner to see if the initials, EBG were crocheted into it there.  They were.  These were the initials of the woman, and she had made this tablecloth 35 years before, in Austria.

     The woman could hardly believe it as the pastor told how he had just gotten “The Tablecloth”.  The woman explained that before the war she and her husband were well-to-do people in Austria.

     When the Nazis came, she was forced to leave.  Her husband was going to follow her the next week.  He was captured, sent to prison and never saw her husband or her home again.

     The pastor wanted to give her the tablecloth; but she made the pastor keep it for the church.  The pastor insisted on driving her home.  That was the least he could do.  She lived on the other side of Staten Island and was only in Brooklyn for the day for a housecleaning job. 

     What a wonderful service they had on Christmas Eve.  The church was almost full.  The music and the spirit were great.  At the end of the service, the pastor and his wife greeted everyone at the door and many said that they would return.

     One older man, whom the pastor recognized from the neighborhood continued to sit in one of the pews and stare, and the pastor wondered why he wasn’t leaving.

     The man asked him where he got the tablecloth on the front wall because it was identical to one that his wife had made years ago when they lived in Austria before the war and how could there be two tablecloths so much alike.

     He told the pastor how the Nazis came, how he forced his wife to flee for her safety and he was supposed to follow her, but he was arrested and put in a prison.  He never saw his wife or his home again all the 35 years between.

     The pastor asked him if he would allow him to take him for a little ride.  They drove to Staten Island and to the same house where the pastor had taken the woman three days earlier.

     He helped the man climb the three flights of stairs to the woman’s apartment, knocked on the door and he saw the greatest Christmas reunion he could ever imagine.  The couple was reunited!

      

The End.

We may be young.

I preface this post by saying I have had leaders and superiors that I love to death and respect in many ways, they have influenced me in a positive light causing me to want to work hard and sacrifice for a larger team. Yet sadly this is not always the case, and that is what I choose to focus on right now. I am not speaking ignorantly either; I have been in the leadership position many times.

 Yesterday I had the opportunity to talk with a great friend of mine from back home. To put simply, She Is Awesome, she’s incredibly smart, dedicated to success, and a very gifted artist, plus she can give tons of great advice about a variety of challenges you may be facing.

We talked about a lot of different of things, but spent a good deal of time discussing challenges she is facing in her current place of employment and also the challenges we have both seen due to our young ages in the “Working world.” She talked of disrespect shown to her, but then being told she was the one being disrespectful simply because she was willing to stand up and speak against things done by her superiors that are blatantly unacceptable and personally belittling. Luckily my friend is not the type of person to simply watch this happen. She is not some random punk kid striving to start discord, instead she is well versed in the rules regulations and laws that are being compromised. She may be young and no more than 5 foot two and 100 pounds, but she knows how to handle the situation. I would not want to be on her bad side as a superior.

I cannot blame many of us as a society who simply sit back and let the disrespect and ill-treatment continue. We are not in a position that allows us to put our employment on the line, we have bills and obligations that make that source of income vital, so we put up with it. I respect these people because they would rather be working then trying to find some way to manipulate the system into taking care of them.

I have faced similar situations and seen way too many of my peers and coworkers treated in an unacceptable manner, where a superior feels they can walk all over those who work under their leadership. I once had a new supervisor create their own personal standards and strive to impose them on me. Long story short I knew I was not in the wrong and frankly I was sick of this individual along with another manager treating us younger employees disrespectfully and like we were ignorant little peons, so I stood up to the situation. It culminated in a heated discussion where the store manager stood speechless, simply standing there looking back and forth between myself and the supervisor as we “talked,” another employee stood in the distance baffled at what was taking place. He told me that I was challenging his authority, well… I agreed, because as much as he wanted to believe it was authority he held, I had done my research, I knew I was safe and he was wrong. I do wish it would not have had to come to such an intense situation, and I’m sure many would tell me I should not have done that, but I was done watching my friends treated how they were.

We may be young, but our desire to achieve our greatest in not going to change. We are the youth and young adults that will change the world, that will lead the various avenues of life, entertainment, business, education, and politics in the near future. I know I speak for all when I give thanks to those who have helped us along our paths. In the complete reverse of what I have been talking about, I have already at my young age had points in my life where I was given more responsibility than I ever imagined I would have. I was the “Leader” and I know I was not perfect, I’m sure there were individuals I had stewardship over that did not appreciate me or felt I was doing something in a wrong manner. I appreciated the council I received on occasion that helped me see a situation in a different light or helped me understand better what was going to help us achieve our highest and best potential. I also know that as much as we may want to be everyone’s friend, when we have leadership responsibilities we have to make a choice, and as imperfect humans sometimes we make the wrong choice and we will get grief for it. I made sure to Never Ever think of myself as above anyone, we were a team, we had different responsibilities, but our goals were the same and honestly the people I have had stewardship over were all so much better than me, I guess I just needed those opportunities to help teach me lessons I had to learn. I’ve loved every second of it, these responsibilities have taught me more than I can describe, and they have shaped my character. These opportunities have refined me beyond anyone trying to walk all over me and telling me that maybe someday I will be the boss.

My intention is not to try and convince the younger generation to be rebellious and oppose anyone who is above us. We can learn a lot from observing the leaders we respect and seeing how they interact with others and do business. However we do not have to simply accept disregard and disrespect when it is shown to us. We have value and worth, and we can make a difference.

We may be young, but do not think for a second that means you can walk over us.

For Those We Love part 2

Smoke covered the bloodshot sun, a sure sign of the Goranth. The Gorth may be human, but they are a twisted and savage people. The common folk are controlled by the Cartel, seven leaders bent on the destruction of any village, city, or nation that opposed their reign. Most of the western world lives in fear of the Goranth nation; few men have ever attempted to stand in their way, most of them no longer live. One man has stood for the freedom of the weak since the age of fourteen. Many times death was inevitable, yet whether by luck, fate, or divine intervention he still walks. Now he leads a few good men to what he inwardly knows will be his last stand. Alexander’s life has been spent protecting those who could not defend themselves. He never sought glory or fame, just the wellbeing of his people.

The march was long; by sunset they had reached the barren lands south of their homes. Alexander met with Jeremy and his brothers’ three sons. “We wait here, we have till tomorrow night to prepare.” Alexander said. “But Sir, they are within sight of our scouts, they will arrive before daybreak.” The youngest son stated. “Jaden, this is true, but they will not attack with the sun in the sky, they are a dark people, they think this will be their advantage.” Alexander said. “They think, It will be, Alex will we attempt an ambush?” Asked the youngest son, “No Travis, the Gorth are always on guard we must prepare a counter attack.” Alexander responded. “William I need you to gather anyone who is learned in the arts of chemistry and return to me.” “Yes sir.” William responded. “William, there is no need for titles anymore, I am just your uncle now, not your leader.” “Okay Alex.” William said with a smile. “Before you leave I have a request of you three. This may seem hard to follow, but you must. After this battle there will be no one to lead our people. That is why you three must survive. Never leave each other’s sides. Once the battle is lost you must flee. Stand together and you will survive. I know this sounds like a horrible act, but it must be done. Give us your word, that you will follow this command.” “We do.” Travis said. “No!, Father I will not abandon my friends.” Jaden firmly stated, “By dieing you would abandon your home. Jaden you and your brothers will lead our city in my absence, they will look to you for hope.” Jeremy said firmly. Jaden looked as if he wished to continue the debate, but knew he must follow his command. All three sons stood speechless as they realized their father last statement assumed his own death. “Fine, but if there is any sign of victory, I will stay to fight.” Jaden finally responded. His father looked as if to argue but was cut short by Alexander. “Agreed, William gather your troops, Travis you will assist your father, Jaden follow me.”

Tasks were set, and preparations made. Late that night before any rest was received, Alexander sat alone in the distance reflecting on his life. If a mans nobility were ranked by how much they did for others, Alexander would be King. Even as he faced death, his only thoughts involved the friends and family he left behind. Thinking of his two beautiful little girls and his unborn child. His beautiful wife Sara, soo many more years they could have been together. He would never see his daughters grow and marry, never know whether he was the father of an honorable son, or another beautiful daughter. “If only I could find a way to end this alone, I would.” He thought as he realized how much each of these men are giving up.

The people in our lives.

“The people and the friends we have lost, the dreams that have faded, never forget them.”

Ever since I was young there have been four people I consider my brothers. The first literally is my brother, the second has been my best friend since before I can remember, the third became my other best friend in fourth grade, and the last is my older brother’s best friend (who is quite literally a part of the family). Each of them has influenced me in different ways, and I have had many great times with all of them. These are four individuals that I am stuck with for the rest of my life and I would have it no other way.

There are other individuals that fit into this “stuck with me forever” category. These are the people that still play a role in my life even if they are half way across the country. A few more examples include my Art History Teacher senior year of High School, or my friend I first met in AP U.S. History, I can talk to her about anything and everything, and the most obvious example (for me) is my family. There are many more people like this and I am grateful for all of them, some from California, and a few I’ve met in Virginia and Salt Lake. There are those I have met recently that have become good friends that I hope and pray become part of my “stuck with me forever” group. I am not the type of individual that strives to make lots and lots of friends, most often I enjoy a small group of close friends compared to a large group of people that I don’t really know. And those close friends I have mean everything to me, I hurt when they hurt, and I am happy when they are happy.

There are also those people you lose along the way, some of them you may even think and hope will be there forever. These people may not be there through the whole story, but there influence can still have a major effect on your story, some for good and others in a negative way. The good we appreciate, the negative we strive to eliminate.

Personally I know God has placed these people in my life for multiple reasons. Some of them are still around after years of putting up with me, some I have met only recently, and some are gone. They stick out from the crowd in a special way. Each of them has taught me life lessons that have helped to shape who I am. Some of these friendships are completely unexpected, the most recent one for example was not planned at all. A classmate I met last semester, her roommate is engaged to a great friend of mine that I met while serving as a Missionary in Virginia. I’m grateful for her and for all the fun times we have had and that we will have. For some crazy reason she thinks she can make tacos better than me??? Haha yeah she is probably right. I truly hope she is part of the “stuck with me forever” group. I see the similarities we have and, at least from my side, I have seen many lessons she has taught me. I truly believe that God placed her in my path. Another is the special lady that I just recently started dating, I met her shortly after moving to Salt Lake, we talked a little bit due to her being friends with my roommate, but over time we have grown our own friendship and relationship. She is a great person that has inspired me and helped me in more ways than she understands.

I would ask that we all remember the people that mean the most to us, many have moved on, and we may only on a rare occasion connect with them if at all, and that is okay it is part of the journey. Each of our stories is unique, and I know mine has been such a grand adventure due to those that have influenced how I write it.

For Those We Love part 1

Alright, a while back i wrote a short story. It is quite nerdy and i'm sure there are plenty of grammatical errors but i will put it on here in small portions, so feel free to read and make fun of me if you want.

For Those We Love part 1

The year is 1153 L.A. (Lost Ages). Alexander, (known to many as Alexander the Hero) is approaching his fortieth birthday. His heroic deeds are known far and wide. Settling down after years of service to others, in a time when peace finally seemed to have the upper hand, he starts a family with his loving wife. With two daughters and another child on the way he is approached with the heart stopping news of an approaching force set on taking their lands and imprisoning any survivors. With less than two days to set up a defense every man willing to stand and fight was gathered. They were first instructed to return to their homes and bid farewell to their families and suit up for war. Many tears later they returned ready to follow their Hero to battle.

“Men, a few of you I consider family, and many of you I could not tell your name, but nonetheless each of us stand together today as brothers. I may not know you, but I am assured that we will each fight with honor that will be remembered for generations to come. What is worth dying for? We are not here for ourselves; each of us forfeit our lives when we came to fight. We are here for the little ones, for our beautiful wives, for our friends, and for blessed way of life we have lived. So that one-day they will rebuild and live in a land without the plague of the wretched Gorth. We will fall, but we will not fail. We will meet an army that outnumbers us fifty to one, but that means nothing. For we have true reason to fight. The Gorth want only to show their power, they envy us, they see us living happily together, no conflict, no strife… they want that. Their pride however stands in the way. Each of you could look to the person beside you and smile at the happiness they have without a shadow of jealousy. But those monsters, they would kill one another just to prove who is stronger. They know nothing of true happiness. This will be a radiant eclipse for our people. A new start, the Gorth will have no desire to even attempt another attack if we are successful. They may be savage, but they know somewhat of survival. The walls our fathers built can keep thousands at bay, but as of now they are too many. By the time the last of us fall, they will be few. Keep that love you feel when thinking of your families present at all times. Young men who have not felt that love, I wish for you to think of you parents, siblings, and anyone who has changed your lives. They give you that love. You have seen the sorrow that plagues the faces of our fellow people. Do not let this be in vain.”

After a momentary pause Alexander lifted his sword high and shouted “To battle!” and as if they had practiced for years, each warrior in unison lifted their weapons and roared in agreement.

The soldiers began to march towards the barren land where they would wait for the opposing forces. “Jeremy.” Alexander said approaching a man best described as a brute. Jeremy who was leading the noble soldiers quietly said. “Alex this is insane, we stand no chance, we should have ran, we would have lost our lands, but at least our lives would remain.” “No, I have dealt with the Gorth many times, they are not only after our lands, they want us to suffer, they would not stop looking until they found us, and since we are the last truly free province, any of those who call themselves our allies would hand us over in seconds. We must stand, and yes our chances of success would not even be seen by the Head Oracle of Irlix, but I feel we will accomplish our task.” Alexander responded. “You are my brother, and you know I trust you, I would follow you straight into the depths of the underworld, but how can you be so confident?” Jeremy asked. “We have a weapon the enemy lacks, a weapon unseen but more powerful than a sword made of Silex. We have honor, courage, love, dignity, hope, loyalty, and fellowship. We have a desire to make a better world for our families.” Alexander stated. “I see.” Jeremy walked a little taller from that point on.

The Road Not Taken.

In times now passed I had made a wonderful friend. We got along great, hung out nearly every day, and grew very close. I loved this individual as a sibling and would have done anything in the world for them (I still would). Unfortunately we each had choices to make and they caused us to go our separate ways. We chose different paths to walk, I wish more than anything I could get in contact with them and catch up on life, sadly I do not think I will ever know what happened to my good friend.

By far one of my favorite poems is Robert Frost's "The Road Not Taken"

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost

It can easily be related to many of the choices we make in life. My one dispute to this poem is that quite often we start on one of these paths, it seems fun and enjoyable, and it is filled with the things we think will make us happy. However as we grow older and wiser, and typically with the help of family and friends, we realize that this path we chose, that seemed so wonderful, it's not where we want to be, and we have become someone we would rather not know. Unfortunately too often we never leave the forsaken path completely behind us, we may let it haunt our minds, find us when we are alone, or for some weird reason we may even brag about the deeds that we are truly ashamed of. As an individual I am beyond grateful for those that have helped me as I write the story of my life. In my opinion the greatest trait a friend can possess is the ability to give another the desire to be a better person. These are the people we should keep closest to us.

A quote I love states "There are many paths, remember that you alone choose the path on which you walk." As much as our friends may try to and wish to help us, it is ultimately our decision. As the friend it may break our hearts to see the people we love making the choices they are. At times it may seem incredibly difficult to make the choice that deep down we feel is right. "The right choice and the most difficult choice are quite often one in the same." If we wish to truly grow and develop a strong character for ourselves these are the choices we must make, these are the choices that will lead to true happiness. We tend to compromise and justify our actions, convincing ourselves that what we are doing really isn't that big of a deal. What we must ask ourselves is simply what we want to become in life? This isn’t really referring to the job we have or the accomplishments we attain, but more so it is dealing with us as individuals.   

Am i perfect? Not even close. I would never even pretend to be, but i have come to see what brings true happiness in life and words cannot adequately describe the gratitude I have for understanding this.

Before moving to Salt Lake I taught a class at Church, the Teachers Quorum (all the 14 and 15 year old boys). Those young men were and still are some of the greatest examples to me. The best part is I knew most of them from the time they were very young, to see them grow and mature has done so much for me. They are shining examples of what this world needs. I am privileged for the chance I have been given to know them.